DEAR GAWD PICFICS LIVES!!!!

HOLY SHIT!!! It's been over a month since I've touched this thing...shameful, really...well, let's see if I can't revive this thing from the dead, eh? Okay...now to revive it I'm gonna need a magical Lovehammer Humor revival potion...

Ingredients:

1 Part Dino Snark

1 Part Bobby Tongue

1 Part Billy Crazed-Smile

1 Part Marty Crack

Mix Well:

And Serve Hot:

And...

IT'S ALIVE!!!! DEAR GAWD ABOVE IT'S ALIVE!!! PICFICS LIVES!!!!

Thanks ahead of time to however bothers to return to my humble blog and reads this. ...I'm truly sorry that I've neglected this for so long but life in Grad School grew more hectic and, well, you know how things go...what? You don't? Oh...well, they go fast! Haha! Thanks again folks and I promise to try and not neglect this blog for so long again!!! -- Tooks ;-)

Love Off: The Final Swing

Marty: So, Bobby..How'd ya do?

Bobby: Fan-fucking-tastic!!! I got 352 women!

Marty: Oh my gawd, dude, you are such a liar!!!

Bobby: No, I'm not! That's how many I had!

Marty: Fuck you, that's how many I got!

Dino: ...I have an idea.

Marty & Bobby: What's that?

Dino: How about you pick one chick and the first to sleep with her wins!

Marty & Bobby: ...Okay...Deal!

Dino: Alright then, I'll pick her - to keep it fair...or whatever. ...How about :points to someone: her!

Marty: Oooo, so sorry, Bobby, but I've already slept with her so it looks like I win!

Bobby: What?!? ...I've already slept with her too!

Dino: ...Are you two serious?

Marty & Bobby: Yeah, why?

Dino: Cause, uh...heh heh...that uh...oh gawd...that was a guy.

Marty: What? No. It's...it's not possible...she...she was so hot and I...I was so hard....It can't be...

Bobby: ...Excuse me, I have to go throw up until I pass out and die...

Billy: Oh my gawd, Dino, was that seriously a guy?!?

Dino: No...well, I doubt it.

Billy: Then why did you tell Marty and Bobby that she was?

Dino: ...Cause it was funny...I mean, those reactions alone were priceless!

...Right, so this ending was thanks in HUGE part to LeperPop God Moist Rub (just read his comment on my last post, haha) ...I honestly could not have thought of a better ending! Thanks Moist!!! :D --Tooks ;-)

Love Off: The "Un-Hammered" Thoughts

Marty: Hey Bobby! I've got 25 so far! How about you?

Bobby: ...Marty, we're in the middle of a show.

Billy: Are they seriously keeping up with that stupid contest?

Dino: Yeah, it's been going on for days now!

Billy: I can't believe it, they're like two guys in a teen sex comedy!

Dino: I know!!! ...Lucky bastards...

Billy: I'm surrounded by infants.

Yeah, not as good but I'm just trying to keep the train rolling lest I "loose the plot" or whatever...Thing is, I don't know who should win? Marty? Bobby? Or maybe I should have some sorta twist ending? ...Any thoughts? Let me know! --Tooks ;-)

Love Off: How Many Have You Nailed?

Marty: Sooo...Bobby...How many chicks have you had so far?

Bobby: Oh my gawd, dude!!! Are you still doing that?!?

Marty: Absolutely! Though from your answer I guess you haven't been doing much at all!

Bobby: Oh, I've been doing plenty!

Marty: Yeah? Well I've had three chicks since we've entered this state alone!

Bobby: :chuckles: Oh, I've had more than that...

Marty: You're lying.

Bobby: No, I'm not.

Marty: Yes, you are...you totally are...

Bobby: Fine, if thinking I'm lying helps you perform better, then I'm lying...But I'm totally not.

Marty: Yes, you are.

I have no clue how long this series is gonna last but it should be an interesting ride, haha! Oh, and the sub-title is a nod to the old Lh shirts that said "Nail This"...which is totally fuckin want!!! --Tooks ;-)

Love Off: The Hammer is Thrown

Bobby: Dino, don't tell Marty this but I'm getting laid WAY more than he is on this tour.

Dino: ...Yeah alright...Hey, did Billy take one of my beers?

Bobby: I'm serious man, don't tell Marty. He'll get all competitive and shit.

Dino: Don't worry, I won't tell him a thing...Damn it, I coulda sworn I had three beers.

The next show...
Dino: Dude, don't tell Bobby I told you this but he says he's getting laid more than you.

Marty: Oh really???

Marty: Hey Bobby!!! ....You really think you get laid more than me??? Bullshit man...I get double the chicks you do!!! In fact, let's take a count...the number of chicks I get over the next few shows versus the number you get!!! How's that sound, huh!?!

Bobby: ...You know I'm gonna kick your balls in for starting this, don't you?

Dino: Oh I pretty much assumed that.

Bobby: Then why the fuck did you do it?

Dino: I figured it'd be worth it anyway...

...So I have no clue where this is actually going but I imagine some sort of "Love Off" between the Marty and Bobby- hence the lame-ass shitty title, haha!! --- Honestly, though, it's probably just my subconsious's excuse to put up hot pics of the two of them in the up-coming episodes or something, lol. Thanks to all those who said I could use their pics...it's too late for me to remember exactly who you are but I really do appreciate it! :D --Tooks ;-)

Mmmbop Madness

Marty: Oh my gawd, dudes, oh my gawd...

Billy: Marty? What the hell is wrong?

Marty: Oh gawd, I...I think I'm gonna be sick!

Bobby: Oh jeeze, just tell us what the hell is wrong!

Marty: Just...just listen!!! Oh sweet heavens...I...I can't take it much longer!!!

Dino: Mmmbop, ba duba dop ba do bop; Ba duba dop ba do bop...

Marty: Aaaaaahhhhhh...make it stop! MAKE IT STOP!!!

That's all I've got for the moment, sorry...My mind's melting cause I've got the RockStar sponsored show tomorrow and then I go to the NJ show this weekend! Wish me shirtless Lovehammer luck!!! -- Tooks ;-)

Marty's Missing Mic - by Heart O Texas

Now where did I put that mic?
Have you seen my mic?

How about you guys?

Don't feel it here...

Not up here...

Found It!

This is entirely Heart O Texas's creation, I just gave it a name! Mad props to her cause I find this funny as hell! --Tooks ;-)